Our minds are powerful. Sometimes our thoughts run away from us. We find ourselves falling into destructive self-talk and negativity. This mindset not only affects us personally, but we end up bringing this baggage into our marriage and parenting. How can you overcome toxic thinking?
Alicia Michelle uses cognitive behavior combined with the Bible to find thought patterns and why we do what we do. She sat down with me to talk about mindset, overcoming toxic thinking, and doing this from a Christian perspective. We chatted about:
The difference between simply saying something to yourself and changing a thought pattern
The importance of the time frame from ages 9-13 and influences during that time
Freedom mindset vs positive thinking and people-pleasing
Finding healing in your subconscious mind using brain priming
The first step in change: paying attention
Having self-compassion
Alicia Michelle has so much wisdom in the area of mindset and breaking free from toxic thinking. I’m so thankful to have had this conversation with her and to have the opportunity to share it with you. I encourage you to check out her podcast and other resources to dig into this topic further.
About Alicia Michelle
Alicia Michelle is an author, Bible teacher, podcaster, and certified NeuroCoach. Known as the Mindset Makeover Coach, she equips Christian women with practical brain-and-biblically-based tools so they know how to renew their minds in order to overcome toxic thinking patterns (such as perfectionism, fear/worry, and not feeling “enough”) so they can cultivate godly confidence.
Sometimes it can be hard to be and to love where you are. It is so tempting to try to speed up time and pass over sticky, messy seasons. We want to rush through suffering and pain. But, there are lessons to be learned and relationships to be built in these seasons. Somer Colbert joins me in this episode to talk about these things and how to love where you are.
Somer knows what it’s like to walk through trials, especially in foster and adoption, but she also knows what it’s like to be in the trenches of raising and discipling kids. She has so much wisdom to share! In this conversation, she and I talk about:
Loving where you and not rushing through various seasons of lfe, especially the hard ones
Sharing Christ with others through our gifts and talents
Seeking relationship instead relief
Walking through the joys and disappointments of foster care and adoption
Living the perfect model found in Deuteronomy 6
Learning to live a life of prayer
Leaving behind panic parenting
I hope that you are encouraged by this conversation with Somer. Spend some time pondering Deuteronomy 6 this week and asking God how to implement the principles in your family!
About Somer Colbert
Somer Colbert is a writer, speaker, and host of the Love Where You Are podcast. She is the Director of Adoption and Foster Care Ministry at Crosschurch and Connected Champion with the Arkansas Baptist Children’s Home and Family Ministries where she creates support, awareness, and advocacy for families seeking to serve in the areas of adoption and foster care. Somer is also a part of the Hope in Grief writing team where she encourages families walking through adoption grief. She creates weekly podcast episodes and resources to equip and empower Christian families to identify their influence for the gospel in every season, live life on mission, and share Jesus right where they are. Somer is passionate about equipping spiritually healthy families and seeing a movement of God’s people step into confidence in their ability to change the world around them through the way they love! She resides in Arkansas with her husband, three kids, and three dogs. She’s obsessed with British docudramas and cooking shows and can always be found with a cup of hot tea in hand. Her life has been forever changed by the love of Jesus, marriage to her favorite person, parenting her crazy crew, and walking multiple adoption journeys.
Translating between languages can be tricky. Sometimes one word just can’t encompass all of the nuances of meaning or one word contains the concepts of two words from another language. When translated into French from English, delight is one of these complicated words. In the French language and culture, you can’t separate the idea of delight from deliciousness. This means that God is both delightful and delicious! Stephanie Rousselle joins me in this episode to talk about how to taste the spice of the Gospel and so much more.
Stephanie is a fantastic Bible teacher. I think you’ll hear her passion for the Gospel in this episode. We talk about:
Seeing the diversity in Christianity across continents and cultures
Coming to Christ as an exchange student
Recognizing nuances of meaning in words across languages
Accepting the historical truth of the resurrection
Realizing that relative truth holds no water
Delighting in the Lord
Tasting and seeing that the Lord is good
The Four Grids: Who God Is, What God Has Done, Who We Are, and What We Do
I hope my conversation with Stephanie encourages you to taste the spice of the Gospel. I pray that you see who God is and find your identity in Him. Delight in the Lord!
About Stephanie Rousselle
Stephanie Rousselle is the founder of Gospel Spice Ministries. Her motto is, “God’s glory, our delight!” Born and raised in France, she has lived for her One over the last two decades on three continents, four countries, and five cities through six professional roles. She is a wife, mom, podcaster, public speaker, Bible teacher, former women’s ministry director, and strategy consultant. And she is 100% French. Stephanie thrives on Bible-centered inspirational writing and speaking, and dark chocolate. She loves sharing nuances taken from the French and English languages and cultures to experience the New Testament from the inside out. She has quoted her favorite words more times than she can count, first to herself and her children, and then also in settings as diverse as Bible studies, conferences, podcasts, and more: “There is nothing you can do for God to love you more; and there is nothing you can do for God to love you less.” Her favorite verse and passion is Philippians 3:10, “For my determined purpose is to know Christ, and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship in His suffering.”
We tend to have relationships based on what was modeled for us as children. That’s the first place we learn about relationships. As parents, we have the opportunity to change the negative patterns and teach our children about nurturing relationships and how to navigate the subtle nuances of relationships.
In this episode, I had the opportunity to talk with my friends Blythe Daniel and her mom, Dr. Helen McIntosh. Dr. McIntosh is a psychologist who has spent her life helping people restore and nurture relationships despite the difficulty of her family life. Blythe is a literary agent. Together they’ve co-written, they’ve written two relationship-based books.
Encouragement to Restore and Nurture Relationships
Blythe and Dr. McIntosh share with me:
How to deal with “mother wounds”
Making a deliberate decision to change patterns
Resolving distance in relationships
Who should make the first move in reconciling a relationship
How strong marriages are related to strong families
The impact of affirming words for moms
How God has created us for relationships
I hope you’re encouraged by my conversation with these two wonderful ladies to restore and nurture the relationships in your life.
About Blythe Daniel & Dr. Helen McIntosh
Blythe Daniel is a literary agent and marketer. She has written for Proverbs 31 Ministries, Focus on the Family, Ann Voskamp, and Christian Retailing. Her agency markets books to publishers. The daughter of Dr. Helen McIntosh, she lives in Colorado with her husband and three children. She and McIntosh have written I Love You, Mom! and Mended: Restoring the Hearts of Mothers and Daughters.
Dr. Helen McIntosh (EdD, Counseling Psychology) is a counselor, speaker, educator, and author of Messages to Myself and Eric, Jose & The Peace Rug®. Her work has appeared in Guideposts, ParentLife, and HomeLife magazines. She resides in Georgia with her husband Jim. They have two children and five grandchildren. She and her daughter Blythe Daniel have written I Love You, Mom! and Mended: Restoring the Hearts of Mothers and Daughters.
Navigating grief is not easy. I’ve endured several seasons of loss in the last few years, so I know this firsthand. My guest on this episode is sadly well-acquainted with grief but has turned her story into one that serves and encourages others as they navigate grief.
Danita Jenae has learned to navigate grief by holding both joy and sorrow in the same breath as a military widow who was already familiar with trials. Shortly after making what was to be their final military move, which would lead into finishing out her husband Dan’s final year of service before retiring, he passed unexpectedly while hiking in the mountains of Colorado. She says that her mountains crumbled that day, in more ways than one.
How to Navigate Grief
Danita shares in our conversation this encouragement for navigating grief:
How she rebuilt from the ground up in a new place
How she handled isolation during the pandemic just months after Dan’s passing
What to say to someone who is grieving
How trauma affects your brain and ability to function
How to handle expectations
How to pray for your kids through their grief
This is such a thought-provoking conversation for anyone who is navigating grief or walking beside someone navigating a season of grief.
About Danita Jenae
Danita Jenae is a young mom and recent military widow learning to carry both joy and sorrow in the same breath. As an author, speaker, poet, and artist, she walks alongside the broken-hearted, offering practical and creative ways to lead a Spirit-led life.
Are you biting your nails a little more than usual lately? Are you flat-out irritated or angry about what you see happening around you? I’m right there with you! We’re living in a woke world. So, what should you do?
Whether it’s Disney, Florida Governor DeSantis signing the law to prevent early elementary-aged children from being taught about gender, or Will Smith and Chris Rock’s “slap heard ’round the world,” anyone with a microphone is trying to tell you how you should think or what you should do in response.
How are they supposed to know what you’re supposed to do?
You’re trying to raise children who love the Lord. I know you don’t have your head in the sand and you aren’t trying to pretend like nothing is happening all around you. You are probably getting flack from every direction for what you’re choosing to do… or not to do. I am too!
Run Your Race in a Woke World
My job and mission here at Equipped To Be and with my weekly episode on The Christian Perspective with Chris Hughes is to equip you for the calling God has set before you. Your calling is different from my calling. Who am I to say that you’re not doing enough? We each need to do what God has called us to do. We need to run our own races.
What should we cling to in the midst life in a woke world? We focus on Scripture. We answer this question: Are we doing what God is telling us to do?
I’m asked a lot of questions about these hot topics. What am I going to do about these things? Well, it’s a personal decision that you and your family have to make. I can’t make that decision for you but, I will say this about consistency and follow-through: Will you cancel a product made in China or North Korea? What about countries that use slave labor to make products? TV stations? Movies? Social media and the companies that run these networks? The store where you buy your groceries? Are you looking into the practices of every company that you buy from or do business with? What did you do when everyone was running away from Target over their bathroom policies? Did you stop shopping there but then gradually start going back there again? What about football or concerts?
I’m not trying to make you feel bad in any way. People will give me flack for this, but, my job is to simply point you back to the Lord. That’s it. My opinion is just an opinion. I’m focused on building character. Are you building character in your children? Are you building relationships with them? You see, my gifting is in exhortation. I want to exhort you to good works. I know it feels like it’s harder to raise kids right now. Everything we’re facing is so blatant, but, look at it this way: Nothing is hidden now. It’s all in the open for you to see more clearly.
What has God called you to do? Are you supposed to be at the podium and shouting from the rooftops or are you quietly in the background sharing truth and providing a meal. If you are called to speak up, then speak up! If you’re called to live quietly, then do that to the best of your ability! Some of you are trying to make a difference from the inside of some of these companies. Run your race!
Model that you are following the Lord rather than following the latest boycott trend or fear scam. Be at peace with where God has you right now and be aware that place could change tomorrow. Step ahead and walk in accordance with how God is leading you. What you do will likely change as your children grow older and your family grows too. We consider everyone in our family and have family meetings to discuss these kinds of topics and decisions.
God Will Meet You There
Disney is not the first company nor will it be the last company that comes out to attack your values. If you need to cancel it, then do it. Cancel every bit of it. Be careful not to shame others who have made a different choice or are doing so quietly.
Whatever the hot button, headline issue of the day is, know that God is going to meet you there. He will lead you into the decision that you need to make as a family.
