The Pros and Cons of Sleepovers – ETB #157

Do you allow your kids to participate in sleepovers? I’m personally not a fan of blanket directives because each family is unique. You have to make a decision about what is best for your family based on the pros and cons of having sleepovers.

The Pros and Cons of Sleepovers - ETB #157

I was recently on Fox 35 Orlando to talk about the pros and cons of sleepovers. It’s hard to have an in-depth discussion on a topic like this in four minutes, so I’d like to dig in a little deeper here on the podcast with you.

Connie at Fox 35 Studios - February 2023

Did you go to sleepovers when you were a kid? If you did, what happened at those sleepovers? There was likely a lot of talking about other people, eating sugar, and staying up all night. Maybe you did things you probably shouldn’t do along the way. Maybe your experiences make you say never to sleepovers. Maybe you had great experiences with sleepovers that you want your kids to have as well.

Pros of Sleepovers

Here are some pros of participating in sleepovers:

  • Social development in an unstructured, relaxed environment
  • Cultivation of independence in your child
  • Creation of defining, lasting memories and friendships
  • Space to learn to make good decisions and problem solve
  • Building trust with parents and friends

Cons of Sleepovers

What about the cons of sleepovers? There are downsides such as:

  • Possibility for bullying
  • Shattering of trust
  • Inappropriate behavior
  • Exposure to drugs and alcohol
  • Sleep deprivation and its results or consequences
  • Disruption of routines
  • Exclusion of some children

Is There a Middle Ground on Sleepovers for Your Family?

Before you choose to take an always-or-never stance on sleepovers, I challenge you to think outside the box and see if there’s another path that might work for your family. It’s important to know your children. It’s critical to have good communication. If you choose to allow or host sleepovers, know and communicate what you expect of your kids and those participating.

In the Albers’ family, we were generally not pro going to other homes for sleepovers. Some of this had to do with our family size and dynamics. I couldn’t have five kids running to five different places. Because my kids’ extracurricular activities, we were also often busy on the weekends making a Friday night sleepover difficult to participate in those activities the rest of the weekend. We built a life that was busy or full to meet the goals and needs of our family. Sleepovers didn’t naturally fit into that plan for us most of the time.

Here are some additional things to consider to help you decide if sleepovers are good for your family:

  • Why are you opposed to or hesitant to let your child attend sleepovers?
  • Is there a legitimate concern for your child?
  • Is this is a declaration that your friends have made?
  • Did you have a bad experience with sleepovers?
  • Do you know everybody who will be there?
  • Will the parents be home?
  • How many kids are expected to attend?
  • Is this a party or a time to hang out with close friends?
  • Ask your child why they want to go.
  • Ask questions to gauge whether your kid can stand up to peer pressure and awkward situations.

Open, honest communication is the key to all of this. Be sure to take the time to explain the responsibility and the dangers that come with sleepovers, wherever your family decides to land on the subject.

Join me in the next episode where we will dive a little deeper into the topic of hosting sleepovers!

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Guide Your Prodigal Home with Laine Lawson Craft – ETB #156

Do you have a prodigal child? Are you desperate to guide your prodigal home? Laine Lawson Craft has lived this story with her three children. Now she’s committed to sharing their testimony and showing parents how to fight the spiritual battle to guide their prodigals back home again.

Guide Your Prodigal Home with Laine Lawson Craft - ETB #156

In this episode, Laine and I talk about:

  • How your kids are being attacked for their destiny
  • The number one thing that a parent (or anyone can do) for a child
  • What is a prodigal?
  • Staying in the game with your adult kids
  • How guiding your prodigal home is a long-term commitment
  • Dealing with discouragement
  • How to handle backsliding
  • How one touch of God can change everything

About Laine Lawson Craft

Laine is dauntlessly committed to guiding parents of teens and young adults to win back their prodigal children.

She partners with prodigal parents so that they find a proven battle plan and strategies to guide them to know that they are not in a war with their child but in a war with the enemy trying to destroy them; they will learn how to have authority over the battles, and how to pray for victory for their prodigal.

With over fifteen years of working with amazing people with similar hurts and spiritual warfare and guiding them to achieve remarkable success, her mission and commitment are to give you insights and revelations into how the darkness of our world operates, build your hope, and give tried-and-true tools and applications that will bring your prodigal home.

Her path to writing this life-transforming battle plan became clear after she fought hell for her children, and her family was healed and won.

Laine is an award-winning, best-selling author, popular media host, and in-demand speaker.

She has been married to Steve, her husband, for over thirty-five years, and she loves spending time with her two sons, only daughter, daughter-in-love, and son-in-love.

References and Links

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Extraordinary Forgiveness in the Life of Corrie ten Boom with Larry Loftis – ETB #155

New York Times Bestselling author Larry Loftis is back on the show to talk about the story behind his newest novel. In this spy thriller, Larry tells the story of the life of Corrie ten Boom. Many of us are familiar with the story from The Hiding Place but that is maybe about ten percent of the story of Corrie’s life. There’s so much more to tell as Larry learned in his research. It’s a story of extraordinary forgiveness.

Extraordinary Forgiveness in the Life of Corrie ten Boom with Larry Loftis - ETB #155

Larry and I talk about

  • Why and how Larry chose Corrie ten Boom as the main character for this spy thriller
  • The research went into Corrie’s life that went into this book
  • The role of Corrie’s father in her life
  • Corrie’s extraordinary forgiveness towards those who seem unforgivable
  • Will Larry’s books be made into movies?
  • How Larry’s books portray remarkable women
  • and more!

Be sure to pick up a copy of The Watchmaker’s Daughter and share it with your family!

About Larry Loftis

Larry Loftis is the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, USA Today, and international bestselling author of the nonfiction spy thrillers THE PRINCESS SPY: The True Story of World War II Spy Aline Griffith, Countess of Romanones; CODE NAME: LISE: The True Story of the Woman Who Became WWII’s Most Highly Decorated Spy; and INTO THE LION’S MOUTH: The True Story of Dusko Popov—World War II Spy, Patriot, and the Real-Life Inspiration for James Bond.  His fourth book, THE WATCHMAKER’S DAUGHTER: The True Story of World War II Heroine Corrie ten Boom, will be released by HarperCollins on March 7, 2023.

A two-time winner of the Florida Book Award, his books have been translated into numerous languages and can be found in Spain, Portugal, Netherlands, Italy, Serbia, Czech Republic, Taiwan, India, Australia, New Zealand, and throughout the UK.

Before becoming a full-time writer, Larry was an AV-rated corporate attorney and adjunct professor of law.  His academic legal works have been published in the National Law Journal, Florida Bar Journal, and the law reviews of the University of Florida, University of Georgia, and Suffolk University.  He received his undergraduate and law degrees from the University of Florida, where he served on the Law Review as the Senior Executive Editor and Senior Articles Editor.

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Why Children Resist Instructions – ETB #154

Do you have kids who resist your instructions? You tell them to do something and they don’t do it. You beg. You lecture. You try to explain why. But, they don’t do what you say or they simply ignore you. Why do children resist instructions?

Why Children Resist Instructions - ETB #154

5 Reasons Why Children Resist Instruction

In this episode, we’re digging into why children resist instructions. There are five reasons you might be experiencing this resistance. Let’s dig into them!

Communication Breakdown

Sometimes, there’s a communication breakdown. Maybe your child feels ignored or dismissed or misunderstood. Kids are trying their best to communicate how they feel and think but their communication skills might be underdeveloped or maybe they are afraid you will overreact. When we don’t get to the heart of the matter, resentment can start brewing. When we don’t deal with this resentment it can lead to more resistance and then rejection.

Power Struggles

Another reason kids resist our instruction is because of power struggles. Your child might feel like you’re trying to control them or take away their freedom. As your kids grow, it’s natural for them to make more of the decisions in their life. You might see this as rebellion. Honestly, neither of you is thinking right about the situation and better communication is needed.

Need to Make Decisions

As your kids get older you have to give them more ability to make decisions and give input. At certain ages and with certain temperaments, if you try to push without explaining why or having a feeling of trust. You have to give your kids the time and space to work things out. Ask them how they would handle things even if you think there’s a better way and let them try or explain why they must follow through on your instruction in this instance.

Differing Priorities

Another reason children resist instruction is differing priorities. Your attention is captivated by all the things that need to be done, while your child might have another focus. You have a feeling of responsibility that is at a level that your child lacks depending on age and maturity. Maybe you’re expecting more of them than they are capable of at this time.

Lack of Understanding

Finally, there’s a lack of understanding. Your child might not understand the reason behind your instruction. This leads to confusion and frustration, which brings on disobedience and resistance. They need to see why doing this thing matters.

Parenting for the Future

Remember that you’re not parenting for the here and now. The things you’re teaching and reinforcing now are the habits and patterns that will follow your kids for a lifetime. Take time to understand your child’s perspective, have reasonable expectations, and give choices when possible. God has given you the skills, the tools, and the resources to be able to teach your specific child so that they respond to your instructions. Ask God to lead you!

References and Links

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Season 3: A Look Back at God’s Faithfulness – ETB #153

I want to take a moment to talk about God’s faithfulness. The Equipped To Be Podcast has reached a major milestone. With this episode and the transition to Season 3, we have marked three years of episodes! There were ups and downs along the way, but I’m so excited to have shared this journey with you!

Season 3: A Look Back at God's Faithfulness - ETB #153

The Equipped To Be Podcast launched in February 2020 right before the world was turned upside down by the pandemic. I couldn’t have done this without the team who works with me to get these episodes out to you each week. We wouldn’t still be on the air without you, the listeners, or our partners and sponsors. It’s such a testament to God’s faithfulness.

Equipped To Be isn’t just about one topic. We talk about things spanning the spectrum from parenting to education to faith and so much more because it’s all about helping you know and understand that you’re equipped to be a doer of God’s word. You have a calling and a purpose.

Many thanks also go to the guests who’ve been on the show. (See a list of some notable episodes below.) I also owe a shout-out to Libsyn, my host, who supported me and gave me guidance along the way.

This podcast started because Amanda Pelser from The Pelsers Media was sitting in my office and talking about starting the podcast. I didn’t have the technical skills to pull this off, but Amanda said she’d help me. She and her husband, Josh, have been with me from the beginning of this podcast!

Many days, I would come into the studio and just pray, “Lord, what do you want me to do?” I’d script it out or make some notes and then hit record. Then Amanda would clean and polish it and deliver it to you. Every step of the way, you were in mind because we don’t want to waste your time. It’s too precious and too valuable.

When God tells you to start something, just start. Start ugly as a book from a friend of mine says in its title. Start with what you have. Do the best you can. Go and grow as God leads. This is what we’ve done with Equipped To Be. We’ve added features over time like images and show notes and we continue to add value as God gives us the tools and resources to do so.

Would you take a moment and help us out? Your support means the world to us!

  • Join our email list using the box below
  • Leave a rating and review in your favorite podcast app like Apple Podcasts, Spotify, etc
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  • Share the podcast with a friend

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I can’t tell you what’s coming next. I’ve been in a very difficult season. I’ve had to strip away many things in my life and ask the Lord what He wants me to add back in. I do know that I have some exciting guests lined up to share stories that will help you in your journey. Back in 2020, I didn’t know if we’d last more than six months, but here we are, still bringing you encouragement. Thank you for listening. This is your milestone as much as it is ours.

References and Links

The following may contain affiliate links.

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