Launching your child brings a host of emotions. For most parents, it’s a bittersweet experience. Feelings of loss, fear, excitement, and satisfaction are some of the more common emotions parents have to work through. But launching your child doesn’t mean the end of your relationship or influence.
Like most parents, I remember the day we launched our first child. He was eager to begin a new season of life. Starting a new chapter is both exhilarating and scary for a young adult. Tom and I were excited for him, but we were a little sad because it meant our lives were changing too.
I’ve learned the experience of launching a child isn’t the same for every child. We were a little more nervous with some than others. Temperament, readiness, and security were on our minds.
Launching the Last Child
Recently, we launched our fifth child. As he sorted through his belongings, trying to decide what stayed and what got packed, I noticed something I hadn’t paid attention to with the others. He purged many childhood memorabilia that had sat on his shelves for years. Things that were once so important to him were now discarded. I didn’t say much because he had to decide without my adding any commentary.
Then, we loaded up his belongings and drove to his new home. He was eager to start this new season of life. It was time, and we all knew it.
I was a little surprised I didn’t experience the same emotions I had with my firstborn. I didn’t cry and I didn’t worry about losing contact with him. Time and wisdom had a lot to do with that. Over the years, I’ve come to realize launching a child doesn’t mean losing our relationship or influence. On the contrary, I found both of those got stronger once they moved out.
Tips to Prepare for the Day You Launch Your Child:
Pray with them and for them.
Try to make sure they leave on good terms.
You can’t script their launch or your reactions.
Remember, they are moving out, not moving away from your relationship.
Manage your expectations.
Don’t put a lot of requirements on them to call you or come visit.
Shower them with confident boasting words. They need to know you believe in them.
Let them know you’ll always be there for them.
Accept that your life is changing, and that is normal.
Find little ways to communicate your love for them.
Children are supposed to grow up and make their way in the world. They don’t forget what you’ve taught them, so allow them to figure out their new life.
People often ask me how I taught my children. I love it when I get the opportunity to share how we homeschooled our kids. But what I love even more is helping parents teach their children! Let’s talk about how to teach children well!
Parents have been led to believe that one needs a degree or some special training to be a good teacher. I wrestled with feeling like I didn’t have what it takes to be a teacher for many years. I had neither an education degree nor special training. What I did have was a desire to provide an excellent education for my children. But that didn’t mean there weren’t times I felt inadequate for the job. Honestly, I’ve never met a parent who didn’t question themselves from time to time. The truth is education isn’t a mystery.
In today’s episode, I’ll unpack three key strategies that will help you teach your children.
How To Teach Children
Know your child.
Encourage them to try.
Manage your expectations.
We must keep in mind that children have a natural desire to learn. The key is for us to nurture their curiosity and not drive it out of them.
How to Nurture Curiosity
Create a positive attitude about school.
Look for signs of readiness.
Work toward mastery, not a completed worksheet.
How We Can Help Our Kids
Show them we believe in them.
Allow them to pursue their interests. (This doesn’t mean they don’t have to do subjects they don’t like.)
Let them observe success being modeled.
Be available when help is needed.
Match readiness with a subject
Let them experience what they are learning in real life.
Provide plenty of activities for them to explore.
We run into trouble when we forget learning new concepts takes a lot of brainpower. You need to know how to help a child who struggles with staying focused and isn’t ready to move forward.
You don’t have to have a degree in education or special training to teach children well!
Do you feel like your year started rough? Does it feel overwhelming? Are you unsure of how to move forward with new leadership? Or are you eager to see God work in your family?
People are passionate about what they believe, and when power shifts from one party to another, people become uncertain. Wherever you find yourself, I encourage you to look for ways to move forward with new leadership by exploring the possibilities before you.
Life is full of change. Who occupies leadership positions does not have to limit our pursuit of truth or the path set before us.
In this episode, I will discuss what you can do when new leadership comes into power.
The Benefits of Prayer
Prayer settles our hearts!
Prayer gives us protection.
Prayer gives us hope.
Prayer gives you stability.
Prayer provides joy in our hearts.
Trying times have a way of driving us to our knees in prayer. It’s during struggles that we see our limitations and weaknesses. But, prayer changes us.
When we pray without ceasing, we experience joy, hope, confidence, protection, stability, and guidance. Our prayers also serve as a model for our children. They are watching and listening. They witness a calmness come over you. They hear hopefulness in our voice. They observe perseverance and resilience, not worry and fear.
Remind your children that our hope is not in a political party, a president, or an administration. Our hope is in the Lord Jesus Christ. Our children learn this by example.
How do we lead our children through this season?
Understand their world
Understand how they process information
Listen to their thoughts and let them talk
Understand their fears
Throughout history, families have faced challenges. Administrations come and go. Each one brings a new set of ideals. Both sides vigorously debate them. Depending on which side your beliefs align with will impact the conversations you have with your children. As you lead your children through the changes that will be rolled out in the coming weeks and months, your instruction will help your child form an opinion. They will also learn how to debate and persuade their peers. No doubt we are a nation divided. Deeply divided. Leading your children equips them with the skills needed to navigate various encounters they will come across.
How do we prepare for all the changes?
Be resilient. God has equipped you to bounce back.
Be diligent. Remember, God tells us not to grow weary in well-doing. God is at work in the hearts of His people.
Be vigilant. You have an assignment from the Lord. Don’t get distracted by the turmoil around you.
We can’t change others by yelling, name-calling, or marginalizing. We have to teach civility to our children by our example. Our mission is to be a light in a dark world! Our example of praying, not worrying makes a difference.
To give our children the tools they need to navigate this world requires discernment. Know your limits so you can live life well.
Moving forward with the new leadership is accomplished when we stay in God’s Word and pray for our family and others.
Did you know only 31% of people read their Bible every week? I’m not sure if that surprises you or not, but It did me. That got me wondering why. What are the hindrances to consistently reading God’s Word? How can you fall in love with God’s word?
Fall in Love with God’s Word
Brittany Ann of Equipping Godly Women joins me on the program to talk about her newest book, Fall In Love With God’s Word. We unpack two of the “7 Core Reasons” that Brittany says are why we don’t spend time in the Word and how we can turn that around.
Brittany’s ideas will help you get more consistent in spending time with God’s word.
About Brittany Ann
Brittany Ann is an author, speaker, and founder of EquppingGodlyWomen.com, a popular Christian-living website dedicated to helping women be “all in” in faith and family. Brittany is married to an incredibly godly husband, and together, they have three adorably energetic little ones.
Are you feeling unmotivated, uncertain, or stuck? You aren’t alone. Though your social media feed is full of 5-day challenges, organizational hacks, and scripture memory designed to help you start the year off right, you can’t seem to do them. You aren’t alone! Let’s talk about how to improve motivation when you’re stuck.
Sometimes we need help getting motivated. In this episode, we will cover simple, time-tested strategies that I have used to help me get unstuck when I lack motivation. Getting unstuck or finding the motivation to move forward is real and can happen at any time. But we can take simple steps to help us get going.
Way to Improve Motivation When You’re Stuck
Set Small, Manageable Goals
Get up and get dressed
Do something physical
Control your schedule
Create simple routines
Just because the calendar year changed doesn’t automatically mean life gets easier or troubles go away. These simple strategies can help you improve your motivation when you’re stuck.
Thank you for tuning into this podcast. I’m grateful you spent your time with me on Equipped To Be!
Has your child been bullied? Do you find out or did they tell you? How do you know if they are dealing with bullying or if it’s general conflict that they can resolve?
It’s vital that children understand the difference between bullying and general conflict so they can properly navigate each scenario wisely.
Parents often teach their children to resolve conflict, but the problem is bullies aren’t interested in resolution. They are interested domination and intimidation. They seek to hurt or harm others by their actions.
As parents we need to learn and teach our children the characteristics of a bully.
Characteristics of a Bully
Aggressive
Repeated
Power Imbalance
Other Key Points
Two important action steps you must do if you think your child is being bullied.
What we must do to protect our child.
How to create a place where your child feels safe: use words like we and us, work together to help your child discern the next steps. Your child needs to know if they are being bullied it’s not their fault.
*If you know someone being bullied or someone who is bullying others don’t ignore it. Contact the proper authorities before the matter escalates. And if your child has been bullied find a trained mental health professional who can help your child work through what happened.
About Candice Duggar
Candice Duggar is the founder of Bullied, Broken, Redeemed, and a nationally recognized anti-bullying expert, author, speaker, and trainer. Candice and her team specialize in equipping leaders, parents, and youth on all aspects of Gen Z Bullying. These life-changing programs use interactive activities and projects to motivate and empower effective anti-bullying warriors. Candice has been seen on NBC, CBN, FRC on top of training fortune 100 companies. She is also regularly featured as a keynote at events nationally and international conferences.
On top of being an anti-bullying warrior, Candice is passionate about helping families transition from public school to homeschool. Her “Coming Home” Series of talks and workshops are a blessing for those trying to navigate the sometimes difficult transition. She is also the co-founder of the Reimagine Education Conference, specializing in helping families transition to homeschooling. This conference is an annual event and has now grown to an international presence with over 80 speakers and 100 talks.
