Dealing with changes in life can be difficult. Whether we like it or not, dealing with changes is essential to our personal, spiritual, and professional growth. We learn how to navigate situations by dealing with changes healthily.
Instead of trying to avoid changes, we should learn to trust the Lord and embrace them. In this episode, we will address the common reasons that make change seem daunting and learn some ways you can navigate whatever change comes your way.
Why Dealing with Changes is Challenging
While there are many reasons we try to resist change, I want to cover the most common ones and provide ways to help you address them so you can move forward.
Fear of the Unknown
Habits and Behavior
Lack of Motivation
Past Failures or Trauma
Fear of the Unknown
Fear of the unknown can be paralyzing. It’s the idea that if you don’t know something, you’re missing out on some important knowledge or experience. Rather than feel paralyzed by this fear, use it as a motivator to learn more and become more comfortable with uncertainty. The uncertainty and predictability of change can be intimidating. And fear of failure can stop us from making changes.
What can we do? Face the fear. Ask yourself questions like: What do I need to know? How can I get the answers? We often resist changes because we fear what we don’t know. So we can educate ourselves and list the pros and cons of a decision. Start by gathering information, then set realistic expectations, and ask for help from friends and family members. Part of dealing with changes is removing fear, not avoiding it.
Lack of Motivation
Most of us know change requires effort and can be uncomfortable. Indeed, we can’t predict an outcome or be in control, but that should not be used as an excuse to change. But if we lack motivation to change, we may struggle to try something new or continue making changes once we start.
What can we do? Identify a compelling reason or purpose for the change. Understand the benefits it can bring to your life, and set clear, achievable goals. Breaking the change into smaller, manageable steps can also make it feel less overwhelming, increasing motivation.
Habits and Behaviors
People tend to stick to familiar routines and habits, even if they know they don’t serve them well. It’s common, but it is something we can change. With the right help and guidance, it can be easier to break away from old habits and create positive new ones.
What to do: Start by identifying the habits that need to change and work on gradually replacing them with new, healthier ones. Consistency and repetition are key to forming new habits. It can be helpful to create reminders, set specific triggers, or enlist the support of friends or professionals to hold you accountable.
Past Failures or Trauma
Previous experiences of failure or trauma related to change can create resistance to trying again. It is important to recognize that change can be scary, and provide ways for people to work through their fears before attempting something new. This could include encouraging them to talk about their traumatic experiences and helping them explore how those experiences have shaped their view of change, especially as it relates to trying new things.
What can you do? Talk with a family member or trusted friend. If you don’t get positive results, consider talking to a mental health professional. Mental health professionals such as counselors, social workers, psychologists or psychiatrists can provide talk therapy and cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) to help you work through your problems and learn new coping skills.
Dealing with Changes Builds Confidence
It’s important to recognize that these reasons for avoiding change are natural human responses and can be valid in certain contexts. However, addressing and finding ways to manage these concerns is essential for personal growth and will help you gain confidence to embrace new circumstances. It’s also worth noting that while change can be challenging, it often brings new opportunities, personal development, and positive outcomes.
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Parents often ask me if family devotions strengthen relationships, and the answer is yes. Family devotions cause us to focus as a family on our relationship with the Lord and each other. They draw us to one another because we become aware of God’s love for us and our love for one another. Family devotions connect us. Today, Karen Whiting joins me to talk about Family Devotions and how you can make them work for your family.
Family Devotions Strengthen Relationships
How Can Family Devotions Strengthen Relationships
Family devotion strengthens family relationships in three ways: makes every family member learn about God’s love for them, creates an opportunity for children to share their hopes, fears, and dreams, and establishes and safe place to connect.
Family Devotions Strengthen Relationships when a Parent is Absent
Doing family devotions can be an important way to stay connected even when one parent is out of town or absent from the home. Families will strengthen relationships between grandparents, parents, and children when they aside time each day to pray together, share Bible verses, and discuss spiritual topics.
Making Family Devotions Fun
We can change how our family devotions by adding crafts, stories, and even when we gather together. Depending on the ages of your kids, you can let your children even plan when, where, and how to get them more involved. You can make family devotions fun and meaningful for everyone.
About Karen Whiting
Karen Whiting is an international speaker, former television host, and award-winning author of over thirty books. She has written over one thousand articles for more than sixty publications and loves letting creativity splash over the pages of what she writes. bio
How to parent a passive child requires thoughtful and purposeful guidance. Whether it’s their birth order or individual temperament, passive children often require extra support in developing decision-making skills and finding their voice.
While it may initially seem uncomplicated to raise a passive child, it is crucial not to overlook the emotions brewing within them. In this episode, “How to Parent a Passive Child,” we will explore key elements to nurture their growth and empower them to navigate the world confidently.
Parenting a Passive Child
Encouraging independence helps passive children find their voice.
Recognizing efforts and improvements boosts a passive child’s confidence.
Creating a safe space for expression means providing opportunities for your child to express their thoughts without judgment.
Giving passive kids the okay to speak up and voice their feelings without fear of getting in trouble can help them feel valued.
In today’s rapidly changing world, where technology and social dynamics are constantly changing, it’s no secret that many find themselves wondering why teens don’t talk to their parents. The age-old challenge of getting teens to talk to their parents about struggles and challenges has taken on a new dimension in the digital age. If you’re a parent seeking answers, you’re not alone.
If you have a teen who doesn’t say much to you you aren’t alone. Jackie Brewton joins me on the podcast to discuss why teens don’t talk to their parents. Their answers might surprise you. We unpack their responses and examine simple things parents can do to break teenage silence and discover effective strategies to get our teens to have open, honest, and enriching conversations.
Top Two Reasons Why Teens Don’t Talk to Their Parents
~Parents interrupt without fully listening.
~Parents are always trying to fix their problems.
Admit Our Mistakes and Treat Kids as Individuals
No one likes to admit they are wrong or imperfect, but we are. The good news is our kids learn how to admit their faults when they see it modeled. Teens don’t expect their parent to be perfect but they would appreciate it when their parents admits when they make a mistake. I’ve had many parents express concerns about saying they did something wrong. The truth is, your kids will respect you more for being humble and honest. And that makes them feel closer to their parent. Remember, kids want to be treated like people, not just children.
Want Teens to Talk More? Spend Quality Time and Validate Emotions
Teens don’t need lavish vacations or expensive dinner dates with you. Their needs are rather simple, do activities together: go camping, play games, go for bike rides, etc. And don’t discount your family traditions. Your teen might not appreciate them at the time, but when they are older, they will become the stories shared with others.
Avoid downplaying kids’ feelings and emotions. Everyone wants validation, and your teen is no different. Teens will turn away when they don’t feel seen or heard by their parents.
Teens consistently mention their need to be affirmed. Marginalizing their thoughts and feelings can do more to push a child away, which is the opposite of what we want. We should look for ways to validate a teen when we are together.
Asking the Right Questions and Observing Behavior
Asking kids if they are okay and showing interest in their friends. A well-timed question helps the child know you care about them and their friends. Though they might not act like it, it does make teens feel loved.
Parents need to observe their children for signs of distress. Body language is a powerful communicator. It shows teens know they are noticed.
Stop Wondering Why Teens Don’t Talk to Their Parents
I know it can be hard to get teens to talk, but may I encourage you to ask the Lord to help reach their hearts by how you love them. Ask your child to help you learn to be a better listener, and try to wait to be asked before trying to fix every problem. Getting your teen to open up might take some time, but the fruit of your efforts will be worth it.
About Jackie Brewton
Jackie Brewton left a thriving corporate career over 20 years ago to follow a higher calling. For over two decades, Jackie has been on a mission to empower teens and equip parents with the essential knowledge and guidance they need on the topics of love, sex, and relationships.
In this episode, we’ll dive into the ever-evolving world of online trends and challenges and discuss how to protect your child from potential dangers lurking in the digital realm. Let’s explore practical tips and strategies to keep your kids safe online.
Understand Online Trends and Challenges
Parents often lag behind in knowing the latest online trends and challenges. Addressing online dangers with children is crucial in today’s digital landscape. However, online trends and challenges gain traction due to their accessibility and potential for a wider audience.
Why Kids Engage in Online Trends and Challenges
Kids create online challenges out of boredom or to gain followers on social media. They may not always consider the impact of their ideas on others. The volume of potentially dangerous activities online has increased in recent years.
Parental Actions to Protect Your Children
Getting to know your child’s perspective and how they process the online world is essential. One way we can do this is by using current news stories as conversation starters about online safety. And encouraging open dialogue about trends and risky behaviors without pressuring your child to name names. Of course, building trust is key to effectively getting your child to open up.
Key Topics to Discuss with Your Child
Digital Footprint Awareness: Help your teens understand the lasting impact of their online actions.
Online Privacy: Teach them the importance of privacy settings and strong passwords.
Cyberbullying Awareness: Discuss reporting procedures and the importance of anonymity.
Critical Thinking: Equip your child with the ability to assess online content critically.
Responsible Online Behavior: Emphasize kindness and respect in online interactions.
Parental Guidelines for Ensuring Online Safety
Know your child’s online activities, websites, and social media accounts.
Keep devices in communal areas to monitor usage.
Regularly review credit card and phone bills for unauthorized charges.
Explore online protection measures at schools and friends’ homes.
Helping Your Child Avoid Online Trends and Challenges
By staying informed, fostering open communication, and setting boundaries, parents can help protect their children from the risks associated with online trends and challenges. Remember, the key is to create a safe digital environment while nurturing trust and understanding in your parent-child relationship.
When should I give my child a smartphone? What is the perfect age? Some parents want to wait until the later teen years, while others think the tween years are better. Is there a right age?
Most parents have doubts about when their child should have a phone. They also, have different ideas of what is appropriate for their child. Here’s the truth: There is no one perfect age when a child should get a smartphone. There are pros and cons to consider before making such an important decision.
What Some Experts Recommend
Prior to the pandemic, the recommended age was when the child entered the eighth grade. And that might be a good age for some of your children. However, now the suggested age is between 10-14, or during middle school, which is the perfect age because kids are still very connected to their parents. They rely on their parents to shuttle them around, which makes teaching a child proper smartphone usage easier.
Also, research indicates most children have already had access to a smartphone by middle school. So, parents need to have smartphone conversations early to establish guidelines and family rules before unacceptable habits get formed.
Since some recommend giving a child a smartphone, how should we decide what is best for our child?
Why Kids Need a Smartphone: Factors to Consider for Safety and Independence
Living in separate households or gaining independence during the middle school years, there are valid reasons why children may require a smartphone at a younger age. Providing a means for them to stay connected fosters a sense of security and peace of mind.
Increased independence: As kids grow and become involved in work, sports, and travel, a smartphone grants them the freedom to coordinate plans, stay connected with peers, and navigate their schedules more efficiently.
Enhanced Safety: With children spending more time alone at home or engaging in various activities, a smartphone allows them to reach out during emergencies or moments of distress, alleviating anxiety and ensuring their well-being.
As parents, it is crucial to evaluate both the necessity and preparedness of your child before providing them with a phone. By considering these factors, you can make an informed decision that prioritizes their safety and development.
Smartphone Readiness: Key Factors to Consider
When contemplating whether to give a child a smartphone, it is important to assess their readiness based on several essential markers:
Displays Good Judgment: Observing sound decision-making skills and responsible behavior in other aspects of their life indicates the level of maturity needed for smartphone usage.
Trustworthy and Open Communication: A child who can be relied upon to approach you with problems and admit their mistakes demonstrates a level of trustworthiness necessary for responsibly handling a smartphone.
Adherence to Rules: Willingness to agree to and follow established rules regarding device usage, including time limits and appropriate content, showcases their ability to exercise self-discipline and respect boundaries.
Deciding to grant a child a smartphone should be done thoughtfully and with prayerful consideration. It is acceptable to wait until you see signs of maturity and feel a sense of peace about the decision.
Signs that Indicate a Child Might Not Be Ready for a Smartphone
It is important to consider various factors before deciding whether a child is ready for a smartphone. Here are some signs that indicate a child might not be ready:
Your own readiness: If you, as a parent, feel hesitant or unprepared to introduce a smartphone to your child, it may be a sign that they are not ready.
False pressure: If there is a sense of external pressure, such as peer or societal influence, to provide a phone to your child, it may not be the right time.
Lacking social decision-making ability: Children who have not yet developed the necessary skills to make responsible decisions in social contexts may not be prepared for the challenges and distractions that come with owning a smartphone.
Age considerations: There are many psychologists who suggest that children under the age of 14 may not be ready to navigate the potential distractions and temptations associated with smartphones.
Ultimately, every child is different, and determining their readiness for a smartphone requires careful consideration of their individual maturity, responsibility, and ability to handle the device’s potential impact on their well-being and development. And to consider the impact on your relationship.
What Should You Do Before Buying A Smartphone
Deciding whether a child is ready for a smartphone is just the initial consideration. Prior to purchasing a device, it is essential to ensure both you and your child are fully prepared for what lies ahead. This requires preparation and maintaining ongoing communication, encompassing the following steps:
Establishing mutual agreement on ground rules, including designated screen-free times.
Configuring parental controls and carefully selecting suitable apps.
Engaging in open conversations about potential online content they may encounter.
Familiarizing yourselves with digital etiquette and safety guidelines.
Formulating a written agreement that outlines the responsibilities and expectations associated with smartphone usage.
Do not succumb to external pressure when it comes to granting your child a phone. As the parent, you possess the insight to determine what your child genuinely needs and what aligns with your family’s values. Remember, you have the authority to establish and modify rules and guidelines as necessary to ensure a positive and safe digital environment for your child. A device is a tool. It’s up to you to know when your child is ready for a smartphone.
