Raising Godly Kids When Faith Paths Drift

Raising Godly Kids is a desire for many Christian parents. But what should you do if your children’s faith path drifts? You may have done your best to teach biblical values, live out your faith authentically, and create a home centered on Christ. Yet, despite your best efforts, you may find that some of your children embrace their faith while others seem to walk away. This can be confusing and heartbreaking. Understanding why this happens can offer encouragement, perspective, and hope. Let’s look at some biblical reasons why children from the same home may follow different spiritual paths and how you can respond in faith.

Today, I share how to face this challenging question: How to Raise Godly Kids When Faith Paths Drift. Why do some children from the same home follow God while others do not? You are not alone in this struggle, and I will unpack what Scripture says, what practical insights we can glean, and most importantly, how you can keep hope alive.

Raising Godly Kids When Faith Paths Drift ETB 259

“Raising godly children isn’t about perfect outcomes—it’s about faithfully planting seeds of truth and trusting God to grow them, even when your child’s faith path drifts in a direction you didn’t expect.” Connie Albers

Individual Free Will: A Matter of Personal Choice

One of the most significant reasons children from the same home may choose different paths is their free will. The Bible clearly teaches that each person must make their own choice regarding faith. In Joshua 24:15, Joshua declares, “Choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve.”

Even in the most faith-filled homes, each child has a personal responsibility to choose whether to follow God or not. This concept is powerfully illustrated through the story of Cain and Abel (Genesis 4). Although they grew up under the same parenting, Cain chose a path of jealousy and violence while Abel chose to honor God.

It’s important to remember that no parent can control their child’s heart or decisions. While you can model faith, pray, and guide, each child will ultimately make their own choices. Accepting this truth allows you to continue loving your children unconditionally, regardless of their spiritual journey.

The Condition of the Heart: Different Responses to the Same Truth

Another crucial factor to consider is the condition of your child’s heart. In the Parable of the Sower (Matthew 13:1-23), Jesus describes how the same seed (the Word of God) falls on different types of soil (hearts), producing different outcomes. Some seeds grow and flourish, while others are choked out or wither away.

Similarly, siblings raised in the same Christian environment may have hearts that respond differently to biblical teachings. One child may eagerly accept God’s truth, while another may resist or struggle to believe. This difference does not necessarily reflect poor parenting; rather, it reveals each child’s unique spiritual condition.

Understanding that heart readiness varies helps reduce parental guilt and reminds you to pray specifically for God to soften the hearts of your children who may be struggling.

Personality and Temperament: Uniquely Wired for Faith

As you consider why children from the same home follow different spiritual paths, it’s to acknowledge their unique personalities. Psalm 139:14 reminds us that each person is “fearfully and wonderfully made.” While one child might naturally lean towards spirituality, another may be more analytical or even skeptical.

Take, for example, the biblical twins Esau and Jacob (Genesis 25:27). Though raised in the same environment, Esau was impulsive and focused on the present, while Jacob was more thoughtful. Their distinct temperaments influenced their choices, including their relationship with God.

Recognizing personality differences helps you understand why one child might be drawn to worship and prayer while another questions and challenges. Rather than feeling discouraged, view these differences as opportunities to approach faith discussions in ways that resonate with each child’s unique wiring.

External Influences: The Power of Peers and Culture

In addition to personality differences, external influences also shape your children’s faith. The Bible warns in 1 Corinthians 15:33, “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’” As much as you may protect your children from negative influences, friends, mentors, media, and life experiences still impact their beliefs.

For instance, a child who grows up in a godly home may still be influenced by secular ideologies at school or through friendships. This can lead to spiritual struggles, doubts, or even rebellion. We are all influenced by our surroundings, so parents must pay attention to who their children spend time with.

Awareness of these influences allows you to have honest, open conversations with your children about what they are experiencing and how it may impact their faith. By maintaining a safe, non-judgmental environment for dialogue, you help them process their thoughts with biblical guidance.

Fighting for Your Child’s Faith

Sometimes, despite a parent’s best efforts, spiritual warfare plays a role. The Bible reminds us that we battle not against flesh and blood but against spiritual forces (Ephesians 6:12). This unseen struggle can profoundly affect your child’s faith journey.

One sibling may feel spiritually attacked in ways that others do not, leading to doubts or a desire to pull away from God. A child’s unique vulnerabilities may make them more susceptible to these spiritual battles. Trust me, this is extremely difficult for a parent because we want our children to be strong and able to withstand attacks and temptations.

As a parent, prayer is your greatest tool to fight spiritual warfare, asking God to protect your children’s minds and hearts. Equip them with spiritual armor (Ephesians 6:10-18) and teach them to stand firm against spiritual attacks.

Trusting God’s Plan Your Child Drifts

While parental guidance is significant, each child’s faith journey is ultimately part of God’s sovereign plan. Romans 9:15 says, “I will have mercy on whom I have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I have compassion.” This means some children may take a different path despite your best efforts.

Think of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32). Although the same loving father raised both sons, one chose to leave and live recklessly. Yet, the father’s unwavering love remained constant, and when the son returned, he was embraced with open arms.

Trusting God’s sovereignty helps you release the burden of controlling outcomes and instead focus on loving your children through their journey, regardless of where they are spiritually.

What Can You Do as a Parent?

  • Pray Without Ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:17): Never underestimate the power of persistent prayer. Ask God to work in your child’s heart, especially when they are resistant.
  • Model Faith Authentically (Deuteronomy 6:6-7): Live out your faith daily, showing your children the practical and relational aspects of following Christ.
  • Love Unconditionally (Luke 15:20): Whether they are walking with the Lord or not, show them that your love remains steadfast.
  • Trust God’s Timing (Isaiah 55:8-9): God’s ways are higher than ours. Be patient and hopeful as you wait for His work in your child’s life.

Even though we can’t control our children’s choices, we’re not powerless—there are still meaningful, faith-filled ways we can parent with purpose and hope.

Closing: Hold On to Hope

Seeing your children take different spiritual paths can be both confusing and painful. However, understanding that each child has free will, unique personality traits, and various external influences can bring some clarity. Remember that God is at work even when it seems like nothing is happening. Your role is to model faith, pray fervently, and trust God with the outcome.

Continue to love your children where they are, keep the door open, and never give up hope. God’s grace can reach even the most distant hearts, and He specializes in bringing prodigals home.

If this episode encouraged you, share it with a friend who needs to hear these words today. And remember, you are doing a great job, even when the results aren’t what you hoped for. God sees your faithfulness, and He cares deeply for your children.

Sponsors, Related Shows, and Links

Want a Bible curriculum that strengthens your teen’s faith and critical thinking? RVL Discipleship: The Curriculum equips homeschool students to engage deeply with Scripture and live out God’s mission. This course, taught by Ray Vander Laan, brings biblical history to life, helping teens see their place in God’s kingdom. Try two free lessons today!

In RVL Discipleship: The Study, join renowned teacher and Bible scholar Ray Vander Laan as he examines what it means to follow Christ through the cultural, historical, and otherwise contextual lens of Scripture. The Study is a four-season video Bible study for small groups and individuals to consider the question: What did it mean to be one of the original disciples of Jesus, and what does that mean for us today?

  • Downloadable leader guides
  • Downloadable participant guides
  • Access all 4 seasons – 39 episodes that are 10-12 minutes long

The following may contain affiliate links:

Subscribe to Equipped To Be

If you find this podcast helpful, please subscribe and leave a review. It’s a great way to support the show and only takes a few seconds.

Have a Question or Want to Book Connie to Speak?

Would you like to have Connie speak at your event? Contact Connie here.

Senioritis Survival: How to Stay Motivated

If you or your child struggles to stay motivated as the school year winds down, you’re not alone. As the finish line approaches, it’s easy to feel drained, distracted, and ready to check out completely.

Senioritis survival is a real challenge, and it doesn’t just affect high school seniors—it can impact middle schoolers, college students, and even parents trying to keep their kids on track.

The good news? Senioritis doesn’t have to squelch the excitement of finishing the school year. With the right mindset and a few simple strategies, you or your child can regain focus, stay engaged, and finish the year with confidence. Let’s start with the most critical step—resetting your mindset.

Senioritis Survival How to Stay Motivated ETB 252

However, how you finish matters—not just for grades but for building confidence, discipline, and a strong work ethic that will carry into the next season of life. The good news? You don’t have to let senioritis win. With the right mindset and a few practical strategies, you can stay engaged, push through the final stretch, and end the year feeling accomplished.

Reset Your Senioritis Survival Mindset

How we think about a challenge changes how we handle it. If your child (or you!) is stuck in the “I don’t care anymore” mindset, it’s time for a reset. Remind them why finishing strong matters—not just for grades but for their own confidence, pride, and future opportunities.

Clearly and carefully discuss how a simple shift in thinking can change perspective.

  • Talk about what’s ahead. Whether it’s earning a scholarship, getting into college, or simply ending the year with no regrets, keeping the big picture in focus helps.
  • Break the workload into bite-sized pieces. Big assignments feel overwhelming, but small steps feel doable.
  • Encourage perseverance. Kids have been learning about hard work and determination their whole lives—now’s the time to use those skills!

💡 Once their mindset shifts, staying motivated becomes easier. But we also need to make studying more engaging…

Make Studying More Engaging

Let’s be honest—staring at a textbook for hours is not motivating. But with some creativity, studying can feel less like a chore and more like a challenge.

  • Switch up the location. Studying in a different room, a coffee shop, or even outside can bring a fresh perspective.
  • Turn assignments into a game. Turn on a timer and “race the clock” to complete tasks.
  • Use creative study tools. Flashcards, voice-to-text notes, or studying with a friend can make learning more interactive and fun.

💡 Keeping things fresh helps, but staying organized and avoiding procrastination is just as important…

Stay Organized & Avoid Procrastination

When everything feels overwhelming, it’s easy to avoid it altogether. But staying organized relieves that stress and gives kids a sense of control.

Here are three ways parents, teachers, and advisors can help their high schoolers or college students:

  • Make a simple priority list. Writing things down helps students see what really needs to get done.
  • Tackle the hardest task first. Waiting until the last minute could mean losing an opportunity—so get it out of the way!
  • Use time blocks. Working for 30-45 minutes, then taking a short break, helps keep focus sharp.

💡 Getting organized is key, but accountability and encouragement can make all the difference…

Stay Accountable & Reward Progress

No one likes to feel like they’re in this alone. A little encouragement and support can go a long way in keeping students on track. Instead of arguing and nagging, try these practical ways to help your child stay motivated and celebrate wins:

  • Check-in with teachers or advisors. A quick conversation can provide clarity on what’s needed to finish strong.
  • Set up daily or weekly check-ins. Whether it’s a parent, a friend, or a mentor, having someone ask, “How’s it going?” makes a big impact.
  • Celebrate small wins. A finished project? That deserves a treat. A tough test completed? A little reward is in order!

💡 Finishing strong isn’t about being perfect—it’s about doing your best and ending the year with no regrets.

Final Thoughts: The Effort is Worth It

In summary, surviving senioritis might make the last weeks of school feel endless, but you can push through. By shifting your mindset, making studying more engaging, staying organized, and leaning on accountability, you can finish the year feeling proud, strong, and ready for what’s next.

References, Related Shows, and Links

The following may contain affiliate links:

Subscribe to Equipped To Be

If you find this podcast helpful, please subscribe and leave a review. It’s a great way to support the show and only takes a few seconds.

Have a Question or Want to Book Connie to Speak?

Would you like to have Connie speak at your event? Contact Connie here.

Humor Defuses Tense Parenting Moments

How Humor Defuses Tense Parenting Moments. It is true using humor is something you can use everyday to reduce challenges between you and your child.

Parenting is messy, unpredictable, and sometimes downright overwhelming. From toddler tantrums to teenage sarcasm, the challenges can quickly turn into stress-filled moments. But here’s the good news: laughter can save the day! Humor isn’t just about making things funny—it’s a tool that can defuse tension, strengthen connections, and help you navigate even the trickiest parenting situations with grace and a smile.

Humor Defuses Tense Parenting Moments ETB 241

Let’s look at how humor can turn those tense parenting moments into opportunities for connection, laughter, and growth.

Why Humor Matters in Parenting

Parenting is a high-stakes job, and it’s easy to feel the weight of trying to “get it all right.” But here’s the thing: you don’t have to be perfect to be a great parent—you need to show up, be present, and sometimes, laugh at the craziness of it all.

Humor lightens the load and reminds you (and your kids) that not every moment has to be so serious. When you bring laughter into the mix, you:

  • Break the tension under challenging moments.
  • Show your kids how to manage emotions positively.
  • Create shared memories that strengthen family bonds.

Let’s break down how humor works.

How Humor Defuses Tense Parenting Moments

Laughter Breaks the Tension

Humor is like a remote control that defuses stress and breaks the emotional cycle of frustration or anger. Whether your toddler is throwing a tantrum or your teenager is rolling their eyes at you, a well-timed joke or playful response can completely shift the mood.

Example: Your preschooler refuses to put on their shoes and plants themselves firmly on the floor. Instead of escalating, you grab the shoes, hold them up like they’re puppets, and say in a funny voice, “Uh-oh! These shoes are sad because they want to go on an adventure! Who’s going to take them out to explore today?” Before you know it, your child is giggling, and those shoes are on faster than you expected.

Humor Model Emotional Regulation

When you use humor to handle tense moments, you’re showing your children a positive way to deal with frustration. Instead of reacting with anger or stress, you’re demonstrating calm and creativity. Kids learn by watching, and your approach teaches them that it’s okay to pause and look for a lighter perspective.

Example:
Your teenager sarcastically says, “Ugh, you’re so embarrassing.” Instead of taking offense, you reply with a smile, “Oh, just wait—my dance moves at soccer drop-off tomorrow will really seal the deal!” Cue laughter (and maybe a little cringing), and the tension melts away. 🙂

Humor Strengthens Parent-Child Bonds

When you laugh with your children, you’re creating shared moment that bring you closer. Those funny, silly moments remind your kids that you’re on their side, even when things get tough.

Example:
Your child struggles with math homework and starts to get upset. You say, “I could help, but last time I tried, I think I broke the calculator!” Your lighthearted comment shifts the energy, and suddenly, tackling math doesn’t feel so overwhelming. Use something that your child can relate to.

Humor Redirects the Focus

Sometimes, all children need is a little distraction to help them reset. Humor offers a gentle way to redirect their attention away from frustration and toward something positive.

Example:
Your toddler refuses to eat broccoli. Instead of forcing the issue, you say, “Did you know broccoli makes you run faster? Let’s see if it works!” Suddenly, the broccoli becomesI exciting, and dinner just got a whole lot easier.

Humor Helps You (the Parent!) Stay Calm

Let’s be honest: parenting can be tough. Humor doesn’t just help your kids—it helps you. Laughing at a challenging situation gives you the emotional distance to handle it with more patience and grace.

Example:
Your toddler colors on the wall with crayons. Instead of panicking, you laugh and say, “Wow, you’ve got a real Picasso vibe going here! But let’s save the masterpieces for paper, okay?” Now, instead of spiraling into frustration, you’ve turned the moment into a manageable situation.

Tips for Using Humor Defuses Tense Parenting Moments

  • Read the Room: Not every moment calls for a joke. If your child is upset, validate their feelings before using humor.
  • Keep It Playful, Not Sarcastic: Avoid humor that could feel critical or mocking to your child.
  • Match Their Age and Personality: What makes a toddler laugh might not work for a teenager—adjust your humor accordingly.
  • Celebrate the Funny Moments: Keep a journal of funny things your kids say or do. These memories will bring joy for years to come.

Wrapping It Up: It’s Okay to Laugh:

Parenting is full of messy, frustrating, and downright ridiculous moments—but those moments are what make the journey so memorable. By using humor, you can navigate the chaos with a little more grace and a lot more joy.

So the next time your toddler refuses to wear pants, or your teenager gives you attitude, remember: it’s okay to laugh. In fact, it’s necessary. Because sometimes, laughter is the only thing keeping you sane—and it’s the glue that holds your family together.

What’s the funniest parenting moment you’ve had recently? I’d love to hear your stories—share them in the comments or send me a message! Let’s laugh together and celebrate the beautiful chaos of parenting.

References, Related Shows, and Links

The following may contain affiliate links:

Subscribe to Equipped To Be

If you find this podcast helpful, please subscribe and leave a review. It’s a great way to support the show and only takes a few seconds.

Have a Question or Want to Book Connie to Speak?

Would you like to have Connie speak at your event? Contact Connie here.

Feeling Inadequate

Parenting can be overwhelming, especially when we experience feeling inadequate or judged by others. In today’s episode, I’ll discuss how to overcome those feelings of inadequacy that many of us struggle with. If your teen is acting out or being influenced negatively, it doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a parent—it means you’re on a journey like the rest of us.

Drawing from biblical truths and practical examples, I’ll provide specific ways to reframe these struggles and embrace the challenges of raising children. I’ll also share fundamental tools and encouragement to confidently help you navigate this season.

Feeling Inadequate ETB 233

Parenting can be overwhelming, especially when we start to feel inadequate or judged by others. If your child is acting out or being influenced negatively, it doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a parent—it means you’re on a journey like the rest of us. While it is common to feel inadequate, those feelings aren’t true. You can confidently navigate this season with a few tools and leaning on God’s Word.

Feeling Inadequate Key Takeaways

Many parents, even those with the strongest faith, face struggles when their teens begin to assert independence or fall under negative influences.

Acknowledge that Parenting is Hard for Everyone

You’re not alone in your struggles. Many parents face feelings of inadequacy, but these challenges are a part of the growth process for you and your child. Reframe your mindset. Accept that challenges don’t mean failure but rather an opportunity for growth for you and your teen. Proverbs 22:6 encourages us to “train up a child in the way he should go,” but that doesn’t guarantee an immediate return or perfect behavior. Trust the process.

Combat Judgment

It’s easy to feel judged by peers, family, or society. But remember, your worth as a parent isn’t measured by others’ opinions. We’ll talk about how to lean on God’s grace and approval.

Reframe “Failure”

Moments when your child is acting out can be seen as learning opportunities for both of you. Take time to connect with your child and show them the love of Christ through the difficulties.

Practical Steps When You Feel Inadequate

From daily prayer to finding community support, explore tangible steps you can take to shift your perspective and handle challenges with grace.

Fostering a Supportive Relationship to Reduce Feeling Inadequate

Building a connection with your child is more important than fixing behavior. Learn how empathy, love, and patience can open the door to positive change. Based on what you observe and the conversations you have, set challenging yet achievable goals.

If your child loves writing but struggles with grammar, encourage them to write stories while gradually improving their grammar skills. The idea is to build on their strengths while gently supporting them in areas where they need growth.

Feeling Inadequate Highlights

  • Understanding the reality: Parenting teens is one of the hardest seasons for any parent. No one has it all figured out.
  • Replacing self-criticism with self-compassion: I’ll talk about why it’s crucial to stop comparing yourself to other parents and how to embrace God’s grace.
  • Real-life examples: Hear stories from parents who’ve walked this road and found hope through faith and practical steps.

Scripture Focus

Throughout this episode, I’ll refer to key scriptures like Proverbs 22:6 (“Train up a child in the way he should go…”) and James 1:2-4 to remind us that God is with us in every season of parenting, refining us and our children through these trials.

Feeling Inadequate Wrap Up

As you navigate your parenting journey, remember that perfection isn’t required—faithfulness is. God sees your efforts and is equipping you every day. You are enough for your child, and with God’s help, you’ll continue to grow as the parent He’s called you to be.

Call to Action:
If this episode encouraged you, please subscribe, share it with a friend, or leave a review. And don’t forget to check out the full episode at [conniealbers.com] or on your favorite podcast platform. You can also join our community for more resources and support. ~Thank you, Connie

References and Links

The following may contain affiliate links:

Subscribe to Equipped To Be

If you find this podcast helpful, please subscribe and leave a review. It’s a great way to support the show and only takes a few seconds.

Have a Question or Want to Book Connie to Speak?

Would you like to have Connie speak at your event? Contact Connie here.

Rethinking Parental Expectations

Have you ever wondered if your hopes and dreams for your child might be more about you than them? It’s a tough question, isn’t it? As parents, we want the best for our children. We want them to succeed, to be happy, and to reach their full potential. But sometimes, in our desire to guide them, we unintentionally place our expectations on their shoulders. This is why rethinking parental expectations that we have for our children offers possibilities for them to follow their God-given bend without damaging our relationship.

But what happens when those expectations don’t align with who our child truly is?

Rethinking Parental Expectations ETB 231

Today, let’s explore how we can rethink our parental expectations and learn to honor the unique, wonderful individuals our children are created to become. It’s about letting go, embracing the unknown, trusting the Lord, and finding joy in the journey of discovering who they are, not who they think they should be.

Why Parents Often Have Expectations and When Those Need to Shift

Parents, we’ve all been there—we set expectations for our kids because we love them so much and want the best for them. Maybe it’s because we value certain things, like a good education or a stable career, or maybe it’s just because we want to see them succeed and be happy. Sometimes, those expectations come from our experiences, the things we’ve learned, or even the dreams we never fulfilled.

It isn’t always easy to examine why we have certain expectations of our kids. But if we focus too much on molding them into our image, we risk stifling their growth and suppressing the qualities that make them unique. It also takes their Creator out of the picture, which is the opposite of what the Lord has planned for our children.

Impact of Expectations on Children

When we set expectations for our kids, it can really shape how they grow and develop. If our expectations are supportive and match who God made our kids to be—their strengths, interests, and personalities—it can boost their confidence and help them feel good about themselves. But when our expectations are too high or rigid, it can make them feel stressed, anxious, or even like they’re not good enough. That’s why it’s so important to find a balance. By being flexible and really listening to who our children are, we can help them grow into confident, resilient individuals ready to face whatever comes their way.

Learning to Honor Your Child’s Unique Nature

Honoring a child’s unique nature means recognizing and appreciating the individuality that each child brings into the world. It’s about seeing beyond the surface, beyond what we might expect or want for them, and truly understanding who they are—what makes them tick, what lights them up, and what makes them feel understood and loved.

When we honor our child’s unique nature, we say, “I see you. I value you for who you are, not for who I think you should be.” It’s about allowing them to explore their interests and passions, even if those paths differ from the ones we might have imagined for them. This approach fosters a sense of security and self-worth in our children. They begin to trust themselves, to believe in their own abilities, and to feel confident in expressing who they truly are.

Reframing Your Expectations

Guiding a child’s path is like being a supportive coach on the sidelines while controlling it, which is more like trying to direct every play in the game. When we guide our children, we’re there to offer advice, share our experiences, and help them navigate choices, but we also give them the freedom to explore, make their own decisions, and learn from their mistakes. It’s about trusting them to find their way, even if it’s different from the path we might have chosen.

On the other hand, controlling a child’s path means trying to dictate every step they take, deciding what they should do, who they should be, and how they should live their lives. It often comes from a place of love and wanting the best for them, but it can feel stifling to a child. It can prevent them from developing their own sense of identity and confidence in their abilities, and if we aren’t careful, it can also keep them from seeking God’s direction for their life.

Think of it this way: guiding is like giving your child a map and teaching them how to read it, while controlling is like holding the map yourself and telling them exactly where to go. Guiding helps them learn, grow, and become independent, while controlling can lead to resistance, frustration, and even a lack of self-confidence. It’s all about finding that balance between offering support and allowing them to be who they are meant to be.

How to Rethink Parental Expectations

Setting expectations that align with a child’s capabilities and interests starts with really getting to know your child—who they are, what they love, and what they’re good at. Here’s how you can do it in a simple, practical way:

Observe and Listen

  • Pay attention to what your child naturally enjoys doing and where they excel. Notice the activities that make them light up and lose track of time. Listening to their interests and passions is key.

Open Conversations

  • Talk with your child about their goals, interests, and what they find challenging or exciting. Ask them what they enjoy and what they’d like to try. These conversations can help you understand their dreams and fears, making setting expectations that match their abilities and desires easier.

Set Realistic Goals

  • Based on what you observe and the conversations you have, set goals that are challenging yet achievable. If your child loves writing but struggles with grammar, encourage them to write stories while gradually improving their grammar skills. The idea is to build on their strengths while gently supporting them in areas where they need growth.

Be Flexible and Discerning

  • Understand that interests and capabilities can change over time. What your child loves today might not be what they love tomorrow. Be open to adjusting expectations as your child grows and explores new things. It’s okay for goals to shift as your child discovers more about themselves.

Celebrate Effort and Progess, Not Just Outcomes

  • Focus on your child’s effort rather than just the end result. Praise them for trying hard, learning from mistakes, and showing perseverance. This approach encourages a growth mindset and helps them feel confident in taking on new challenges.

By setting expectations that are in line with who your child truly is, you’re helping them grow in a way that feels natural and empowering. You’re not just guiding them; you’re partnering with them in their journey to becoming their best selves.

Encourage Social Connections

Remind your child that getting involved on campus can help them feel more at home. Joining a club, playing intramural sports, and participating in a study group can be great ways to meet new friends and build a support system. We are created for community and relationships, and getting involved is an excellent way to ease homesickness.

Wrapping It Up

Honoring a child’s unique nature creates a supportive environment where they feel free to be themselves. We give them the room to fail, succeed, grow, and learn in their own ways.

This approach not only helps build a stronger, more authentic relationship between you and your child but also helps raise confident children who can listen to the Lord’s leading. And isn’t that what we all want for our children?

References and Links

The following may contain affiliate links:

Subscribe to Equipped To Be

If you find this podcast helpful, please subscribe and leave a review. It’s a great way to support the show and only takes a few seconds.

Have a Question or Want to Book Connie to Speak?

Would you like to have Connie speak at your event? Contact Connie here.

When Teens Stop Liking Parents

When teens stop liking their parents, it hurts. Do you know what I mean? Have you ever looked into your teenager’s eyes and felt like a stranger? As a mom, nothing stings quite like realizing that the child who once clung to you now seems to tolerate your presence barely.

It’s a heartbreaking shift that leaves many of us feeling lost, questioning our worth, and wondering where we went wrong. But take heart—you are not alone in this struggle. While it may feel like the bond you once had is slipping away, there is hope and a path forward to healing and understanding.

When Teens Stop Liking Parents ETB 230

When your teenager seems to push you away or act like they don’t like you, it’s easy to feel hurt and react out of frustration or fear. However, there are some key things you should avoid doing during these challenging times to prevent further damage to the relationship. Here are five actions to steer clear of that can help keep the door open for healing and connection, even when it feels like your teen is shutting you out.

What To Do When Teens Stop Liking Their Parents

Acknowledge the Hurt

Acknowledge the deep emotional pain and confusion that come when a child who was once so close becomes distant. Although this phase may feel overwhelming and never-ending, it’s important to remember that it’s just that—a phase. With patience, understanding, and a steady hand, you and your teenager can navigate this season and emerge with a stronger, more resilient bond.

It’s okay to feel down, but you can’t stay down. God is in control and continues to work all things out for His good and His glory.

What You Need To Know?

  1. Understanding the Teenage Mindset
  2. Humanizing the Pain: A Mom’s Perspective
  3. Practical Steps to Take
  4. Finding Support
  5. Holding on to Hope

Understand A Teens Mindset

To make it through these tough moments, it helps to step into your teen’s shoes and understand what they’re really going through. The teenage years are a rollercoaster of emotions, independence, and self-discovery. By understanding their mindset, you can approach them with more empathy and patience, helping to keep your connection strong, even when things feel rough.

Hormonal and Developmental Changes: Hormone changes and brain development can affect a teenager’s mood and behavior. The hard part for parents is that many teens don’t fully understand what is happening to their bodies, which makes communication much more difficult.

Desire for Independence: As teens try to establish their independence, they may push away from their parents as a part of this process. We want our kids to gain independence so they can handle adult life, so being able to observe what is happening will help you.

The Role of Peer Influence: Peer relationships can become more important, often overshadowing family relationships. We must discern how influential friends are on our child and help them become strong and confident in who God made them to be.

Romans 12:18 – “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.”

Humanizing the Pain: A Mom’s Perspective

  • A Normal Experience: I want to remind you that feeling hurt is normal and that you are not alone in this experience.
  • The Power of Vulnerability: Acknowledge your feelings and possibly even share them with their teenager calmly, non-confrontationally.

Psalm 147:3 – “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”

Practical Steps to Take

  • Stay Consistent in Love and Support: Continue to show love, even when it feels unreciprocated.
  • Create Open Lines of Communication: Keep communication open by actively listening, not interrupting, and validating feelings.
  • Respect Their Space and Independence: Giving teens the space they crave while being present and available shows your teen respect and understanding.

Finding Support

Lean on Your Community: Don’t be afraid to contact friends, family, or support groups who understand what you’re going through.

Consider Professional Help: Consider seeking help from a counselor or therapist for your teen or yourself. Sometimes, getting outside help gives you insights into what can be done to make the situation less stressful.

Holding on to Hope

We have to remember to have hope. God is at work. Your child is not going to feel this way forever. Even during the toughest times with their teenager, there’s always a reason to stay resilient and patient.

  • The Power of Time: Like many phases, this too shall pass. Teens grow up, mature, and often return to a closer relationship with their parents. 🙂
  • Encouragement to Persevere: I want to encourage you to continue your unwavering love and patience, which can make a profound difference.

Malachi 4:6 – “And he will turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers; lest I come and strike the land with a decree of utter destruction.”

Scripture for Strained Relationships

  1. Ephesians 6:4 – “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”
    • This verse highlights the importance of nurturing and guiding children without causing unnecessary conflict or resentment.
  2. Colossians 3:21 – “Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.”
    • Encourages parents to avoid actions or words that may lead to bitterness or discouragement in their children.
  3. Proverbs 22:6 – “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
    • It suggests that a strong foundation, even if met with resistance during the teenage years, will have lasting effects.

Scripture For Healing and Reconciliation

Healing and reconciliation offer hope that strength will be renewed through patience and reliance on God.

Isaiah 40:31 – “But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.”

Corinthians 5:18-19 – “All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.”

James 5:16 – “Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”

Wrapping It Up

Watching your teenager pull away can be one of the most heartbreaking experiences as a parent. It’s tough—there’s no sugarcoating that. But take heart: you’re not alone in this journey, and it doesn’t mean you’re losing them forever.

With the Lord, patience, empathy, and a lot of love, this difficult season can be a time of growth, so hang in there—your bond is stronger than you think. God’s got you and will lead you through this season of parenting.

References and Links

The following may contain affiliate links.

Subscribe to Equipped To Be

If you find this podcast helpful, please subscribe and leave a review. It’s a great way to support the show and only takes a few seconds.

Have a Question or Want to Book Connie to Speak?

Would you like to have Connie speak at your event? Contact Connie here.