by Connie Albers | Feb 13, 2014
Learning to listen to your children is one of the most important things you can do to strengthen your relationship. Your children need you, no matter their age, and will continue to need you even as they reach adulthood and begin their own families. One of the ways you can be there for them is to listen to them. Truly listen.
This is difficult, I know. There are a lot of people and activities competing for our time that create a number of hindrances to really listening. Here are a few I’ve noticed in my own life: (more…)
by Connie Albers | Jan 30, 2014
In a world full of devices and non-stop connecting…They still call Mom.
One day you are wrapping your arms around your child to comfort them for a skinned elbow, or making them a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, or putting on a colorful Band-Aid that fixes anything. Now, you are receiving late night texts from your young adult child asking for prayer about a heart-breaking relationship. It appears our older, wiser mentors were right when they said, “Challenges of parenting do not go away when the kids get older; they just get more complex.”
This is what I was told many times.
Now that my children are older I find myself echoing similar statements.
In my early years of parenting, when I passed up opportunities to be more involved outside the home, I questioned my decisions.
Invitations to sit on boards in the community or serve on committees at church were carefully considered so that I could have the time, and energy to avail myself to training the hearts of my children and cultivating our relationships. The early morning time readings, conversations and prayers, the talk-time in the cars on the way to co-ops and sporting events, the hanging out on the couch in the very late evenings because that’s when they liked to open up and share their deepest thoughts—all these cumulative moments and hours helped cultivate a heart in my children to maintain a relationship with me even now.
When they were younger, the focus was on teaching worldviews, Biblical truths, and basic life disciplines. That focus continues but now with more emphasis on listening, encouraging and supporting. It is a rich blessing, a high calling and a beautiful ministry.
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by Connie Albers | Jan 20, 2014
The focus during your child’s teen years needs to be helping them find their strengths, gifts, and passion. Thankfully, homeschooling allows time for this. After all, real homeschooling is all about seizing the teachable moments with your child.
My daughter had a love for cooking and plate presentation. So, I had an idea during her senior year of high school. We gave a portion of the family food budget to her so she could plan a menu of her choice and prepare the meals she desired. It was never a forced requirement; I didn’t want to kill the passion she was developing.
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by Connie Albers | Jan 9, 2014
Oh not again! Your eyes begin to fill with tears. You want to dry them up but the emotions are just too strong this time. That look, you know the one I’m talking about, that look from your once adoring child. That teenager, who once thought you could do no wrong, now seems to only glare at you when you speak to them. You’ve stayed up late reading every blog or article you could find on being your child’s best friend. Every morning you purpose to try the new approach you learned the night before. You’re optimistic, surely this will work. However, after several attempts your frustration builds, discouragement begins and you find yourself wanting to give up.
The mental dialogue begins. I call it the blame game. If you can just identify who has the problem then you could get some emotional relief. All you want is for that sweet precious child to look and speak to you with that “I love you so much” attitude, the one you had enjoyed for so many years. You talk to your friends thinking they will have the answer, you pray and cry out to God to make it better. Nothing seems to be working. (more…)
