When teens stop liking their parents, it hurts. Do you know what I mean? Have you ever looked into your teenager’s eyes and felt like a stranger? As a mom, nothing stings quite like realizing that the child who once clung to you now seems to tolerate your presence barely.
It’s a heartbreaking shift that leaves many of us feeling lost, questioning our worth, and wondering where we went wrong. But take heart—you are not alone in this struggle. While it may feel like the bond you once had is slipping away, there is hope and a path forward to healing and understanding.
When your teenager seems to push you away or act like they don’t like you, it’s easy to feel hurt and react out of frustration or fear. However, there are some key things you should avoid doing during these challenging times to prevent further damage to the relationship. Here are five actions to steer clear of that can help keep the door open for healing and connection, even when it feels like your teen is shutting you out.
What To Do When Teens Stop Liking Their Parents
Acknowledge the Hurt
Acknowledge the deep emotional pain and confusion that come when a child who was once so close becomes distant. Although this phase may feel overwhelming and never-ending, it’s important to remember that it’s just that—a phase. With patience, understanding, and a steady hand, you and your teenager can navigate this season and emerge with a stronger, more resilient bond.
It’s okay to feel down, but you can’t stay down. God is in control and continues to work all things out for His good and His glory.
What You Need To Know?
Understanding the Teenage Mindset
Humanizing the Pain: A Mom’s Perspective
Practical Steps to Take
Finding Support
Holding on to Hope
Understand A Teens Mindset
To make it through these tough moments, it helps to step into your teen’s shoes and understand what they’re really going through. The teenage years are a rollercoaster of emotions, independence, and self-discovery. By understanding their mindset, you can approach them with more empathy and patience, helping to keep your connection strong, even when things feel rough.
Hormonal and Developmental Changes: Hormone changes and brain development can affect a teenager’s mood and behavior. The hard part for parents is that many teens don’t fully understand what is happening to their bodies, which makes communication much more difficult.
Desire for Independence: As teens try to establish their independence, they may push away from their parents as a part of this process. We want our kids to gain independence so they can handle adult life, so being able to observe what is happening will help you.
The Role of Peer Influence: Peer relationships can become more important, often overshadowing family relationships. We must discern how influential friends are on our child and help them become strong and confident in who God made them to be.
Romans 12:18 – “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.”
Humanizing the Pain: A Mom’s Perspective
A NormalExperience: I want to remind you that feeling hurt is normal and that you are not alone in this experience.
The Power of Vulnerability: Acknowledge your feelings and possibly even share them with their teenager calmly, non-confrontationally.
Psalm 147:3 – “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”
Practical Steps to Take
Stay Consistent in Love and Support: Continue to show love, even when it feels unreciprocated.
Create Open Lines of Communication: Keep communication open by actively listening, not interrupting, and validating feelings.
Respect Their Space and Independence: Giving teens the space they crave while being present and available shows your teen respect and understanding.
Finding Support
Lean on Your Community: Don’t be afraid to contact friends, family, or support groups who understand what you’re going through.
Consider Professional Help: Consider seeking help from a counselor or therapist for your teen or yourself. Sometimes, getting outside help gives you insights into what can be done to make the situation less stressful.
Holding on to Hope
We have to remember to have hope. God is at work. Your child is not going to feel this way forever. Even during the toughest times with their teenager, there’s always a reason to stay resilient and patient.
The Power of Time: Like many phases, this too shall pass. Teens grow up, mature, and often return to a closer relationship with their parents. 🙂
Encouragement to Persevere: I want to encourage you to continue your unwavering love and patience, which can make a profound difference.
Malachi 4:6 – “And he will turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers; lest I come and strike the land with a decree of utter destruction.”
Scripture for Strained Relationships
Ephesians 6:4 – “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”
This verse highlights the importance of nurturing and guiding children without causing unnecessary conflict or resentment.
Colossians 3:21 – “Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.”
Encourages parents to avoid actions or words that may lead to bitterness or discouragement in their children.
Proverbs 22:6 – “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
It suggests that a strong foundation, even if met with resistance during the teenage years, will have lasting effects.
Scripture For Healing and Reconciliation
Healing and reconciliation offer hope that strength will be renewed through patience and reliance on God.
Isaiah 40:31 – “But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.”
Corinthians 5:18-19 – “All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.”
James 5:16 – “Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”
Wrapping It Up
Watching your teenager pull away can be one of the most heartbreaking experiences as a parent. It’s tough—there’s no sugarcoating that. But take heart: you’re not alone in this journey, and it doesn’t mean you’re losing them forever.
With the Lord, patience, empathy, and a lot of love, this difficult season can be a time of growth, so hang in there—your bond is stronger than you think. God’s got you and will lead you through this season of parenting.
Welcome to Healthy Back to School Habits Part 1 with my friend, Loisann Fowler of Coach in Tandem! As the new school year approaches, we want to ensure our children are set up for success both in and out of the classroom. Today, Loisann and I will discuss two crucial areas: improving your child’s nutrition and ensuring they get quality sleep. Let’s explore some practical, easy-to-implement tips that will make a big difference in your child’s health and well-being.
I know life is busy, and meeting our healthy habits goals can be difficult when school picks back up. That’s why now is a perfect time to consider five easy foundational non-negotiables we can incorporate into our homes before school starts.
In part one of Healthy Back to School Habits, Loisann and I focus on eating real foods and getting quality sleep. Let’s start with eating real food.
Healthy Back to School Habits: Eat Real Food
What do you mean when you say eat real food? It’s simple. It means foods with no labels. No additives, food coloring, or added sugars. According to Mark Hyman, there is no such thing as “junk food.” There is junk, and there is food. What we are talking about here is real food. Food that nourishes your body and gives your child energy. How do we know if food is good?
Check labels. It might take a little time initially, but you will quickly find products that are better options for your children.
Choose fresh fruits and vegetables to have available for lunches and snack time.
Limit processed, pastries, or boxed goods as much as possible.
Introduce new natural food every day to expand your children’s palates.
Studies show that children who eat real food perform better, think clearer, and experience a general sense of well-being. What foods should our children eat?
Include 3 Foods Everyday
When we create our weekly meal plan, let’s focus on serving:
High-quality proteins
Healthy fats
Good Carbohydrates
By simply starting with these three food groups, we can have peace of mind knowing our children’s bodies are receiving the nutrients they need to thrive.
Healthy Back to School Habits: Quality Sleep
Understanding why children need quality sleep and getting them to get that sleep
Sleep allows our brain to repair damaged cells.
Hormones are rebalanced and reset during sleep cycles.
Sleep allows our brain to destress from the activities of the day.
Muscle and bone strength occur during sleep.
Emotional regulation happens while we sleep.
Knowledge is stored in our long-term memory when we sleep.
One of the best ways to ensure our children function optimally is to ensure they sleep for an appropriate number of hours.
Healthy Back to School Habits Matter
The little habits you implement today will yield huge rewards in your children’s future. Remember, they trust you to take care of them. Children don’t instinctively know what is good for them. You create an environment where they can truly thrive by creating healthy back-to-school habits, serving your children real food, and teaching them the importance of getting adequate sleep.
Thank you for joining us today! We’re so glad you’re here and committed to helping your child succeed. Stay tuned for Part 2 of our Healthy Back to School Habits series, where we’ll discuss three more easy, healthy habits to support your child’s success. Remember, every small step you take makes a big difference. You’ve got this!
About Loisann Fowler
Loisann Flower is a nationally board-certified functional medicine health coach. She helps people from teens to 90-somethings uncover and achieve their highest wellness in body, mind, and spirit. There is a gap between our level of health today and where we want to be. Loisann’s coaching bridges that gap, discovering lasting practices for a strong and energetic life.
In “Raising Creative Children Part 2,” I continue to share information about understanding the unique needs of our young artists. This week, I’m excited to share essential insights and practical tips to help parents and educators recognize the importance of providing time and space in a creative child’s daily life. By fostering an environment that nurtures their imagination and respects their need for unstructured moments, we can help our children truly thrive and develop their creative potential.
Following the enthusiastic response to Part 1, I continue our journey into understanding and nurturing the unique talents of our young creatives. We want to be aware of their needs so their talent can be fully developed.
Creative Children View Life Differently
A creative child views the world through a lens of endless possibilities, where every ordinary object holds the potential for extraordinary transformation. They see patterns, colors, and stories in the most mundane settings, turning every day into a canvas for their imagination. Their perspective is rich with curiosity and wonder, and they constantly seek to explore, understand, and reinvent the world around them.
Common Needs of Creative Children
Creative children often display a unique set of traits and behaviors that distinguish them from their peers. I could list many characteristics of a creative child, but these will help you identify the common characteristics :
Vivid Imagination: Creative children frequently have rich imaginations and enjoy inventing stories, games, and scenarios.
Curiosity: They often ask a lot of questions and show a keen interest in exploring and understanding the world around them.
Energetic: Creative children are usually energetic and enthusiastic, particularly when engaged in activities they are passionate about.
Resilience: They are often persistent and resilient, willing to tackle challenges and learn from failures.
Self-Directed: Creative children often prefer working independently and may resist conventional instructions or routines.
Depth of Emotion: They often experience and express deep and complex emotions through their creative outlets.
When we pay attention to what our creative children need, we can better nurture their creative potential effectively.
Creatives Need Encouragement
Encouraging your creative child doesn’t have to be complicated; small, everyday actions can make a significant impact. Here are some practical examples to help nurture and inspire your child’s creativity at home.
Provide creative time and space to think and form ideas.
Encourage exploration and experimentation: Allow your child the freedom to experiment with different art forms, materials, and techniques, encouraging them to take risks and embrace mistakes as valuable learning experiences.
Celebrate effort, not just results. Creative children tend to be more sensitive to failure, and they thrive when we praise their progress.
Teach them how to fail. Failure can cause them to produce better work.
Watch for naysayers who discourage your creative child.
Creatives tend to push the boundaries of everyday reason. We want them to take risks and be adventurers, innovators, and explorers, but we must be careful not to make them conformists.
Supporting children’s artistic journey not only fosters their talents but also contributes to their overall personal development. By encouraging exploration, offering support, and celebrating their efforts, you are not only helping your child develop their creative talents but also instilling confidence and resilience that will benefit them throughout their lives.
Have you ever wondered how to encourage and develop your child’s creativity without overwhelming them or stifling their natural curiosity? I have. Raising creative children taught me so much about how creative/artistic kids see and engage in the world around them that I started speaking on this topic years ago. This topic is so valuable to parents that I decided to dedicate two episodes: Raising Creative Children Part 1 and Raising Creative Children Part 2.
During this episode, I will share practical tips to help you cultivate a nurturing environment that allows your child’s imagination to flourish. Whether your child loves to paint, dance, write, or invent, they need you to guide and celebrate their creative journey. So, grab a smoothie, relax, and let’s embark on this exciting adventure together! 🙂
Before we talk about nurturing a creative child, you need to know how they think, feel, and experience the world. If you take time to learn some simple characteristics, you’ll enjoy the rewards of watching them grow and develop their craft.
Creative Children View Life Differently
A creative child views the world through a lens of endless possibilities, where every ordinary object holds the potential for extraordinary transformation. They see patterns, colors, and stories in the most mundane settings, turning every day into a canvas for their imagination. Their perspective is rich with curiosity and wonder, constantly seeking to explore, understand, and reinvent the world around them.
Common Characteristics of a Creative Child
Creative children often display a unique set of traits and behaviors that distinguish them from their peers. I could list many characteristics of a creative child, but these will help you identify the common characteristics :
Vivid Imagination: Creative children frequently have rich imaginations and enjoy inventing stories, games, and scenarios.
Curiosity: They often ask a lot of questions and show a keen interest in exploring and understanding the world around them.
Energetic: Creative children are usually energetic and enthusiastic, particularly when engaged in activities they are passionate about.
Resilience: They are often persistent and resilient, willing to tackle challenges and learn from failures.
Self-Directed: Creative children often prefer working independently and may resist conventional instructions or routines.
Depth of Emotion: They often experience and express deep and complex emotions through their creative outlets.
When we pay attention to what our creative children need, we can better nurture their creative potential effectively.
Supplies for Creative Children
By providing the right resources, environment, and encouragement, you can help your artistic children hone their skills and develop their unique creative voices. It’s about progress over perfection, nurturing imagination, and learning to fail and keep going.
Basic Supplies: Keep a stock of essential items like paper, pencils, paints, brushes, and clay.
Specialty Items: Occasionally introduce more specialized materials such as canvases, charcoals, or digital art tools.
Books and Tutorials: Invest in art books, online tutorials, and classes that cater to your child’s interests.
Your children look to you not just for basic needs but also for emotional and spiritual support. They need you to protect them from harm, teach them right from wrong, love them unconditionally, serve them with a joyful heart, and play with them. All these actions create lasting memories.
Practical Examples to Encourage Creatives
Encouraging your creative child doesn’t have to be complicated; small, everyday actions can make a significant impact. Here are some practical examples to help nurture and inspire your child’s creativity at home.
Provide creative space. Creative children need time and space to think and dream.
Encourage exploration and experimentation: Allow your child the freedom to experiment with different art forms, materials, and techniques, encouraging them to take risks and embrace mistakes as valuable learning experiences.
Celebrate effort, not just results. Creative children tend to be more sensitive to failure, and they thrive when we praise their progress.
Create diverse experiences: Encourage your child to explore various activities and environments, such as visiting museums, attending art workshops, or spending time in nature to broaden their creative horizons.
Encourage collaboration and sharing
When you add practical examples for your children, you will foster a supportive environment that nurtures and develops a child’s creative abilities.
Supporting children’s artistic journey not only fosters their talents but also contributes to their overall personal development. By encouraging exploration, offering support, and celebrating their efforts, you are not only helping your child develop their creative talents but also instilling confidence and resilience that will benefit them throughout their lives.
Have you ever paused to consider the profound impact you have on your children’s lives? In a world that often underestimates the significance of motherhood, it’s crucial to remember that motherhood is a ministry. It’s a high calling, a divine appointment, and an opportunity to shape the hearts and minds of your children in a way no one else can. The success of the next generation rests on your shoulders.
While others may dismiss the high calling of motherhood, they are simply blind to the truth. Mothers play an unmatched role in their child’s future success. We can’t believe the lies that moms don’t matter!
The Ministry of Motherhood
Motherhood is a ministry, a sacred calling bestowed upon us by God. In a society that often overlooks the profound importance of raising children, we must remind ourselves of the extraordinary role we play in our children’s lives. As mothers, we have the unique ability to influence, inspire, and shape the future through our daily interactions with our little ones.
One of the most beautiful aspects of motherhood is the ability to offer unconditional and enduring love. It’s in the quiet moments of rocking your baby to sleep, the joyful giggles during playtime, and the comforting hugs after a long day that you weave a tapestry of love that your children will carry with them throughout their lives. These seemingly small moments are the very essence of what makes motherhood a ministry.
The Attributes of Motherhood
Many mothers spend hours praying and asking the Lord to help them be the moms they desire to be. Friends, I want to encourage you by saying you will learn and grow in your role as a mother. Don’t be discouraged.
Nurturing: A mother’s touch is soothing, her voice calming. She knows how to comfort and care for her children in a way that no one else can.
Patience: Motherhood requires immense patience as you guide your children through their various stages of growth and development.
Selflessness: A mother often puts her children’s needs before her own, sacrificing time, energy, and sometimes even her own dreams for the sake of her family.
These attributes of motherhood underscore the profound truth that being a mother is more than just a role; it’s a divine calling. God gave you your children to teach and train for their good and His glory. But it will also require developing some personal attributes.
Personal Attributes of Motherhood
Wisdom: Mothers possess a unique insight and understanding, offering guidance and advice that can only come from deep love and experience.
Strength: A mother’s resilience is unparalleled. She faces challenges with courage and determination, always striving to do what’s best for her children.
Despite the world’s noise suggesting that motherhood doesn’t matter, it’s important to recognize that your role is vital.
Your children look to you not just for basic needs but also for emotional and spiritual support. They need you to protect them from harm, teach them right from wrong, love them unconditionally, serve them with a joyful heart, and play with them. All these actions create lasting memories.
Motherhood is a Divine Calling
Motherhood is a ministry. It’s a divine calling to influence your children in ways that only you can. While society may undervalue this role, remember that in God’s eyes, your work is of eternal significance. Your ministry as a mother extends beyond the immediate tasks of daily life; it touches the very core of who your children will become.
Feeling Overwhelmed and Overlooked
So, the next time you feel overlooked or underappreciated, remember this: motherhood is a ministry. It’s a beautiful, challenging, and rewarding calling that shapes not only the lives of your children but also the future of our world. Embrace it with all your heart, for there is no higher calling than to be a mother.
Remember, you are not just raising children; you are raising future leaders, thinkers, and compassionate human beings. Your role is vital, and your influence is immeasurable. Motherhood is indeed a ministry, and you are doing a remarkable job.
Keep leaning on the One who knows what your children need far better than you for wisdom. Keep going. You’re doing a remarkable job.
As a mom, you know how detrimental comparison can be. Today, I’ll be sharing five principles on a topic that I believe resonates with every mother out there: navigating motherhood without comparison. As a mother myself, I understand just how easy it is to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others. The seemingly perfect social media posts, the well-behaved kids in public, the moms who seem to have it all together – it’s a minefield out there. But today, I want to share with you five key points to help you steer clear of this comparison trap and focus on your unique journey.
To help you avoid the comparison trap, here are five essential points to help you navigate motherhood with confidence and grace
Abide in the Word
The first and most important point is to abide in the Word. As mothers, we need to ground ourselves in the truth of God’s Word. It’s easy to get caught up in the world’s standards and forget that our value and worth come from our Creator. Psalm 139:14 reminds us that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made.” When we immerse ourselves in Scripture, we gain perspective and strength. It’s in these moments of quiet reflection that we are reminded of who we truly are and the unique path God has laid out for us.
Remember Your Purpose
Sometimes, it is hard to remember we are called to run our race. Every mother has a unique purpose. It’s easy to lose sight of this when we start comparing ourselves to others. Remember, your journey is yours alone. God has entrusted you with your children for a reason. When we focus on our purpose and the special role we play in our children’s lives, it becomes easier to tune out the noise and focus on what truly matters. Embrace your individuality and celebrate the unique gifts you bring to your family.
Avoid Motherhood Comparison with Humility
Humility is a powerful antidote to comparison. When we serve others with a humble heart, we shift our focus from ourselves to those around us. Philippians 2:3-4 encourages us to “do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” Serving with humility helps us to appreciate the journey of others without feeling the need to compare. It fosters a spirit of community and support rather than competition.
Even in Biblical times, mothers were concerned about the success of their children. The mother of John and James came to Jesus, requesting, “Say that these two sons of mine are to sit, one at your right hand and one at your left, in your kingdom” (Matthew 20:21). While the other disciples took offense at her request, surprisingly Jesus did not rebuke her for her desire but instructed, “Whoever would be great among you must be your servant” (26). Following the way of Christ and humbly serving others is the path to greatness in motherhood.
Consider the Person Comparing
Sometimes, we are our own worst enemies. The person doing the comparing is often ourselves. It’s important to recognize this and extend grace to ourselves. We all have moments of doubt and insecurity, but these moments do not define us. Acknowledge your feelings, but don’t let them control you. Remind yourself that you are doing your best, and that is enough. Give yourself the same kindness and understanding you would offer to a friend.
Cultivate Gratitude Not Comparison
Finally, cultivating gratitude can transform our perspective. When we focus on what we have rather than what we lack, we begin to see the beauty in our lives. Start a gratitude journal or take a few moments each day to reflect on the blessings in your life. Gratitude helps to shift our focus from comparison to contentment. It allows us to appreciate the little moments that make motherhood so special.
As we navigate motherhood without comparison, our journey is filled with great joy. It’s crucial to remember that comparison is a thief of joy. By abiding in the Word, remembering our purpose, serving with humility, considering the person comparing, and cultivating gratitude, we can find peace and fulfillment in our unique path. Until next time, take care and cherish every moment.
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