The purpose when I started writing Parenting Beyond the Rules was to talk about the principles that we’re trying to instill into our kids as we’re raising them: Discipline, kindness, sharing, honesty, trustworthiness, etc. But, it is so easy to get confused and think that this parenting thing is all about the rules. If you break a rule, then here’s the consequence. It is so much more than that!
This week, I’m continuing the series on Parenting Beyond the Rules. You can listen to Part 1 here.
As I wrote the book and it went through the editing process, the message changed along the way. The cover of the book so perfectly illustrates what the book really turned out to be. The paint brushes and the strokes of paint show how it’s really about how your children are each a masterpiece in the making. Your kids are not all the same. We’re not making assembly line parts!
I talk a lot about parenting the child you have. I teach that you need to adjust and pivot, but remember that kids also need routines and reliability. They need you to be a steady anchor in their lives. As much as it might seem easier, the masterpiece you are helping shape is not color by number. I learned how different kids can be as I raised my kids. I can point to one who was extremely artistic and another on the opposite side who was a fact-checking STEM kid.
Creating a Masterpiece
God is the architect of your children. He formed them but He’s asking you to add skills and knowledge. He wants you to help them discover their callings and their uniquenesses. Here are some ways that you can guide your children and build relationships with them:
- Tell your kids their stories. Share stories from the times they won’t or can’t remember for themselves.
- Have conversations. You’re building relationships that will stand the test of time. You’re building a family legacy!
- Pray for your children by name. Pray with them. Let them know you’re praying for them.
- Paint broad strokes of forgiveness. Ask your kids for forgiveness. I live by the motto forgiveness requested, forgiveness granted. Live this out with your kids.
- Paint pictures of possibilities. Tell them what’s possible. Tell them where they are going. Tell them why.
I challenge you to think outside the rules. Pivot and adjust as needed to meet the unique need of your children!
References and Links
The following may contain affiliate links.
- 7 Tips to Improve Listening to Your Teen – ETB #16
- Awaking Wonder In Your Child with Sally Clarkson – ETB #26
- Praying Mom with Brooke McGlothlin – ETB #69
- How to Build Sibling Relationships – ETB #86
- Teach the Principle Behind the Rules – ETB #88
- When Mentors Replace Mothers – ETB #90
- How to Be the Parent Your Child Needs – ETB #94
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